Monday, April 18, 2011

Submission Margay

Name: Margay Leah Justice
Email: Margay1122(at)gmail(dot)com
Title: A DEMON'S REDEMPTION - Paranormal Romance
Pitch: The lines between good and evil have been drawn but they blur when redeemer Lorelei falls for sweet-talking demon Azazel. Can she trust him?

250 Words:


When I was born, all of the demons in hell cashed in their chips to vie for me. Not for want of me, precisely, but for what I represent. I am cursed – or blessed – with the ability to sniff them out. Kind of like a psychic bloodhound. And unearth them. Literally. But in a crazy twist of irony, I am also the conduit for them to buy their way back into heaven. For one month out of the year, it is my duty to help the truly repentant on their journey back onto a nobler path. Unfortunately, during this time, my senses are somewhat blighted, so I can’t smell them coming. Or send them packing, back into the fiery pit from which they arose. Who makes up these rules? Well, at least they can’t harm me during that time, either. That’s the condition of the truce, anyway. Welcome to hell –

Lorelei’s fingers crashed against the keyboard as the scent of sulfur wafted beneath her nose. As if someone had just lit a match. Only stronger. More pungent. More…sinister. Damn. She knew that smell – and it always brought trouble. Not now, she thought. My one free moment before the big exam and I have to contend with a wayward –

“I’m not here to harm you,” a deep, almost guttural voice sounded from behind the tree against which she was propped.

2 comments:

  1. I love the set-up and the pitch and I'd love to read more of this story!

    That said, I'm not a huge fan of the introductory explanation--sort of feels like cheating, like a big info dump. Is it possible to weave this information through the first few chapters? The sentence with Lorelai in the second paragraph would make a great opening sentence.

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