Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Revised Entry 3 Artemis Grey

Title: Thornbriar
Genre: YA Fantasy Retelling
My Name: Artemis Grey
Email: Greyvaledesigns(at)gmail(dot)com

Pitch:

Most Ladies get china sets for their wedding. Beauty got a Beast with multiple personalities and a cursed magic kingdom nobody believed in. Now, as the new Queen, it’s up to Beauty to sort things out.

Second Line:

Instead, the black shaft of the arrow passed through her ruby curls as she staggered sideways.

First 250 of Second Chapter:

Beauty spent the remainder of her journey sequestered in the shadows of Liivan’s coach. The Senior merchant attended her only enough to satisfy protocol but otherwise let her be. She did not again ask about the possibly bestial Woodlord. Part of her truly wanted to, for would it not be better to know of what she faced? But then, in a way, it didn’t matter. She would marry him regardless.

It was much easier to uphold her fierce determination and bold resolve within the shelter of the coach. The peculiar way in which the Altheans had moved around her made all the more sense now. They had seen from the moment she’d been introduced that she did not fully understand her own situation.

Her cheeks burned to think of it but when she spoke to Liivan, it was with easy elegance and lovely smiles. The strange people of Althea might think her a simpering, foolish maiden, but Beauty would make the most splendid Queen they could have ever imagined. Her beauty had brought her this far, it would serve her yet.

Selene did not have the same spine on the matter. Of course, Selene was plain, in manner more than feature. Her demeanor only dimmed what would have else wise been a comely enough face. Beauty had no patience for the quailing of her handmaiden and might have left her standing beside the roadway if it wouldn’t have caused talk later.

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